Thursday, March 7, 2013

Finding my Tuscan Sun

Monday night, as my nieces and nephew were fast asleep in the other room, I sat alone on my aunt’s couch watching a film I never in my life expected too: Under the Tuscan Sun.

One of the reoccurring themes in this film is fate and at that very moment – and still to this day-- I believe that it was fate that I happened to turn on that film.  The lines speak to my heart in the most haunting way, while the characters bring to life people in my own.

Though I am not going through a major break up like the lead, I feel like I have been trying to get over a loss that was just bad as hers. Not only that, but I have been trying to get over it the same way as her by escaping to places unknown and trying to find the ending goal: happiness. But that’s the problem with happiness, you can’t go searching for happiness, happiness finds you. A lesson she learns through out the film and though I relate more to the lead I long to be the miraculous English woman with her fancy hats and ice cream. Something I believe the protagonist wishes to be too. She lives in the moment and allows magic into her life rather then trying to create it herself. Because of this she is happy and is never second-guessing or wondering that dreaded “what if”.

Maybe it’s the left over wanderlust from England or maybe it’s the fact that I have fallen in love with some obsolete film but I want to go on adventures. I want to travel the world. I want to walk the El Camino Trail, visit the rooms that hold great historical value to the life of the Romanovs, live in a villa in Italy for a summer, teach children in a foreign country.  In other words, I just want to live.

The problem with living though is that it costs money and in order to get money you have to study hard and work vigorously. Two things I am thankfully good at but it still doesn’t make my dream completely attainable, but who know? Maybe with the right amount of positivity and will power I can make this dream a reality.

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